I tend to see the worst in people. The harm they cause and the people they hate is the part I see. When most people would see a friendly talkative person I see a toxic person who is disrespectful to anyone not similar to them. I know their ways aren't reasonable so I hate them back without reason. The things they call truths are in reality just self-fulfilling prophecies but they choice to stay unaware of that and instead engage in labeling them as objective truths. This shows that they are hell bent on causing harm. They have convinced themselves this isn't just a concept someone else created but objective reality and they can not be reasoned out of it.

This isn't just hurting feelings either. These are people who can do things that effect others. These are people who play a role in the society we live in. A society some live in willingly and others not. When they decide someone is unfit for a job they are fit for because of lack of social skills that causes harm. When they all do that there is no find another job because they are all following the same made up rules. This stabs deep into the life's of those who don't live and breath the rules of the system. This is what it means to be a outcast.

Hate isn't making the world any better. I want to love instead of hate but I feel I can't love people knowing what I know. In fact I can't even accept them knowing what I know. People who are hell bent on making my life and my friends life worse aren't people I can show any non-hate feelings toward even if I want to love. As much as I do not want killing what if as long as they exist they will not let the freedom and well being of me and my friends coexist. As much as I want a peaceful solution the only people that can make bad people not bad is themselves and they are not going to do it.

I have became trigger happy and a loose cannon. Everyone I see as my enemy until proven otherwise and still even after to a degree. After so much I gain a taste to inflict pain only to discover the people I truly dislike are immune. They hold social power over me which gives them protection from anything I could do. They are always holders of morals and truths in their own minds which numbs them from anything I could say. The people I can harm or insult are those I care about and I sometimes end up getting them in the cross fire.

Maybe it's selfish to want freedom and well being for me and my friends when everyone else declared their existence demands we suffer and their demands can only die with them. Regardless I want freedom and well being for me and my friends. We should not have to put up with social constructs even if the upholders will put their own life's on the line to defend them. Though even if this is justified we have no hope.